I returned one week ago from an eight day vacation in the Puerto Vallarta, Mexico area with my husband. My social media post from Day 2 of the trip shows the joy, excitement, and beauty that you hope for on a vacation. What it did not show was that I got some of the worst food poisoning of my life on Day 3. I spent a day completely in bed, wrecked with body pain and bathroom adventures. I was sick for the rest of the trip, mostly water fasting because my body could not handle food and certainly could not handle any more unknown Mexican bacteria.
Honestly, I’m already shaking my head and laughing about this. How ridiculous to plan a sexy, fun vacation with your partner and instead get A LOT of quality time with the porcelain throne.
In the moment though, it didn’t feel funny at all. It felt disappointing— and frustrating! It triggered my story— why am I always the highly sensitive one that gets sick? No one told me this might happen here. No one prepared me for this.
Oof. As I write that out, I hold my own heart so tenderly. Our painful stories of ‘why me’ and ‘what’s wrong with me’ are familiar, but securely in the category of unnecessary suffering. Why is it that when we are in a tough spot, we often make it so much worse by replaying a mental story of our ego?
I’ll tell you why… because it’s hard to surrender to the moment. It’s hard to simply live life completely raw and unfiltered. Retreating into ego stories is a natural part of being human, but it’s one that we have to become conscious of so that we can challenge our own thoughts. We don’t have to believe these stories of unnecessary suffering. We can see— right in the moment— that we have a choice about how we relate to what is happening.
Then, rather than trying to escape the direct experience of pain in the moment by retreating into the mind, we can simply open and allow what is.
Everyone experiences disappointment. Everyone gets thrown challenging curve balls from what they had planned. Everyone feels pain.
So why make it personal? Why make your current challenge mean something about you? You probably (hopefully!) aren’t experiencing food poisoning. Lol. However, you most certainly have your own flavor of life challenges right now.
My invitation for you today is to not make your current challenges mean that something is wrong with you. Don’t give into believing mental stories that say you shouldn’t be experiencing pain or suffering. That is false. Challenges are a natural part of the human experience. You can’t avoid them!
What you can do… is surrender to them. Surrender to the moment. Allow yourself to directly meet the suffering. Feel the pain, the grief, the frustration, and then let it go. Return to the present moment without making any stories about what the future may or may not hold. Resist the temptation to let suffering in the moment alter your sense of personal identity and empowered self.
Open to life. Open to challenge. Know that it’s natural. When you open to pain, you also give yourself unfiltered access to joy, love, ecstasy, and beauty.
Live with an open heart. Live courageously. Live raw. And when you need to— just bring some extra toilet paper along for the ride. Haha. You’ve got this.
With laughter and blessings,
Kelley